So the women - Ranya Idliby, Suzanne Oliver and Priscilla Warner - instead went to another church across San Diego County, whereon they spoke to about 65 people of the journey that led to their interfaith book and how to find the good in the ashes of tragedy.
"I wouldn't be sitting here if it weren't for 9/11," Warner said. "I would never have met Ranya, I would never have met Suzanne."
When bad things happen, it's an opportunity, Oliver said.
"It gives us the opportunity to recognize the God that is in that other person."
Idliby's response was somber as she spoke of 9/11 and San Diego's recent wildfire inferno.
"Imagine if the fire had a name and it was Islam," she began. "You can imagine how American Muslims felt that day."
Idliby is a Muslim. Oliver is a Christian. Warner is a Jew. After 9/11, Idliby and Oliver met at a school bus stop, where they were dropping off their children. They struck up a conversation, and Idliby told Oliver about her desire to write a book about the three faiths. Oliver introduced her to Warner - and the conversations began.
Their book, "The Faith Club," came out a year ago and has inspired women across the country to start forming interfaith clubs of their own. The authors also launched a Web site - thefaithclub.com - where people interested in such groups can post messages, get tips and find resources.
"It's a call to dialogue," Idliby said of the book.
Inside the ornate sanctuary, the trio admitted the conversations they had - especially in the beginning - were hard. They had to confront stereotypes - Jews accused of being Christ-killers and Muslims accused of oppressing women. They had to learn to listen to each other and to respect each other.
"Two or three meetings into our relationship, we were up to our eyeballs in difficulties," said Oliver, an Episcopalian.
They also had to learn not to compare their suffering or try to one-up each other about which faith has been victimized the most.
"It doesn't serve us," Warner said.
Idliby, who does not wear the familiar head scarf for Muslim women, said they had to separate the tenets of culture from the tenets of their religion.
But they hung in there. They became colleagues - and friends. They've also become mentors for others who want to follow their lead.
Kim Wakefield is hoping to form a faith club in Oceanside, Calif.
"I am fascinated by religions, because I think their commonality is greater than their differences," she said, clutching a copy of the book. "It's all about living a life that's worthwhile," Wakefield said.
Karen Kohlberg, who was staying in a hotel because her family was evacuated during the wildfires, told the authors about an interfaith youth group that went to Mexico to help build a home. Afterward, as people lined up to have their books autographed in the social hall, Kohlberg spoke about her amazement at the young people who spent a weekend together as part of a program called Homes of Hope.
She watched as Christians, Muslims and Jews installed a window, handing each other nails, focusing on doing something for someone else.
"It was just the most inspiring thing," Kohlberg said.
The authors admitted that not everyone is pleased with "The Faith Club. They've been accused of betraying their religions for not insisting that their way is the only way or that their side is right and the others are wrong.
But that's OK, they said. They think the moderates are listening.
"We do think the moderates are the majority," Oliver said.
IN THEIR OWN WORDS
"I don't believe it's a gender-specific book. It's a human book. This book goes against instinct to edit yourself. Sensible people must speak up in all traditions, be it man, woman or child." - Ranya Idliby
"The fear of the next plane to hit was our fear with 9/11. Here, the enemy is nature. It's easier to make peace with your neighbor. After 9/11, it was more difficult to make peace with your neighbor. A different kind of fear. The fires won't be politicized in the same way." - Suzanne Oliver
"Pain is part of life. You can't measure it or compare it to anybody else's suffering. The lesson of the book for me was humility. The ultimate notion was that you're not in control. The only thing you can do when confronted with pain is to search deep within yourself to find your own faith." - Priscilla Warner
"A lot of people are concerned and asked me: 'Aren't you confusing your children?' When a person is confident and secure within themselves, they have an openness of heart toward others. When a person is insecure and vulnerable, that creates the need to polarize, separate, vilify the other. They maintain their identity through fear of the other."- Ranya Idliby
"People have said to me: It sounds like you want to create one big world religion. No, that's not it. Our faiths have been enlightened by our conversations with each other. We have become more grounded in our own faith traditions while respecting each other's beliefs." - Suzanne Oliver
"People in the middle have to step up and raise their voices and make people aware of and speak out about their compassion." - Priscilla Warner
FAITH CLUB TIPS
Be honest.
Sincerity helps overcome conflict. Be open.
Air what's on your mind and don't block your ability to understand each other.
Be humble.
You don't have all the answers and no one else does, either. Keep coming back.
Even when your feelings get hurt.
