"It's very weird. My daughter's got one," Dempsey says about his shrimpy screen likeness that retails for $24.50 and comes packaged with a trench coat. "It's a bit surreal when your kid is playing with your doll. The other night, she was acting out scenes of the movie with it and talking as me."
Hmm. Imagine the fun grown-up groupies - especially the ones who cavort about in ABC-sold "Future Mrs. McDreamy" T-shirts - can have. After all, the human-sized boy toy has a McWife.
Dempsey has been married for eight years to Delux Beauty cosmetics founder Jillian Fink, whom he met when he walked into her Los Angeles hair salon to get his now-famous mane cut. The couple has three children - 5-year-old Talula and 9-month-old twin boys Sullivan and Darby.
There's also an ex-Mrs. McDreamy. In 1987, the same year a much nerdier Dempsey starred in the teen comedy "Can't Buy Me Love," he wed his manager, Rocky Parker. He was 21; she was 48. The union lasted seven years.
"Yeah!" he acknowledges, breaking into a wide grin. "I think it's because I watched 'The Graduate' too early in my life and was affected by it."
"No," he quickly demurs, reverting to his nice-guy self. "It was certainly an unorthodox relationship, but I learned a lot from that relationship. She was an amazing woman who taught me a great deal." The 41-year-old laid-back, unshaven Dempsey is perched on a chair in a posh hotel suite, ignoring his constantly chiming cell phone as he chats about everything from his twins' projectile vomiting to his "Grey's Anatomy" contract that allows him to pursue his hobby of driving race cars. ("If anything happens to me, they can make it into a new medical case or story line," he jokes). One minute, he proudly recalls his second-place win as a teenager in an International Jugglers Association contest. The next, he candidly talks about his ongoing struggle with dyslexia, which he says forces him to "basically stumble my way through" cold readings of scripts.
This day, one of the "sexiest men alive" looks oddly preppy in a dark V-neck sweater, tie and slacks, but then the all-American look is fitting for a leading man of a Disney family film. In the clever live-action and animated "Enchanted," Dempsey plays Robert, a suave single dad who was dumped by his wife and doesn't believe in true love. He's engaged to be married again when his life is changed by Giselle (Amy Adams), a bubbly, bighearted princess who has been banished from the cartoon world to modern-day New York by an evil queen (Susan Sarandon).
Robert is practical when it comes to romance. Dempsey sounds a bit mushier.
The weekend before, he and his wife drove up to Santa Barbara, Calif., to attend a wedding, and "we had a great talk, and that was a romantic moment for us," he says. "And it was nice to be in the vineyards and hold each other's hands and walk around, to steal a moment at this point, with three kids and a crazy career for both of us."
He's not shy about admitting he and his wife go to couples therapy to work through problems. "Absolutely. Every now and then, you go and you check in. I think it's key for a successful relationship. It's better than letting things build up."
At least it's healthy to know that in real life, he'd have two words for "Grey's" emotional ditz Meredith: "Stop whining!" And he says even he's stunned by the popularity of sensitive Dr. Derek "McDreamy" Shepherd, a role he got because the first casting choice, Rob Lowe, turned it down.
"People really find that character compelling. I don't quite understand. It's funny when you have grandmothers, mothers and daughters all in the same family come up to you and really kind of get nervous around your presence. It's got to do with the character being a doctor and a nurturer.
"This couldn't have happened at a better time in my life to be able to handle that kind of projection, where you know at the end of the day you couldn't possibly have lived up to any of it." If he were single and 25, "I'd probably be out of control." He chuckles at the thought.
These days, he's a proud papa who boasts that Darby recently waved goodbye to him for the very first time. "I don't change as many diapers as I should," he concedes. "It's not my favorite thing. Or crying babies. I like when they're laughing."
Dempsey got the idea of Darby's name from punk rocker Darby Crash, who died in 1980 of a deliberate heroin overdose. More than a decade ago, in the children's department of a Fred Segal store, a salesgirl named Talula waited on him, and he decided then if he ever had a daughter, she'd be called the same.
When he was filming "Enchanted," his Talula visited the set during the ballroom scene. "The wardrobe girls gave her a dress to wear, so she got to play dress-up. It was really sweet," he says. "She still wants to know when she can spend more time with the princess."
Dempsey's own fairy tale would have him being a movie star and raising his family back in his native Maine. About a dozen years ago, with his acting career in the tank, he bought an 1834 farmhouse in Maine so that "no matter what happened, I'd always have a place to stay. That made me extremely secure."
He also bought a home next door for his mother, Amanda, whom he helped successfully battle ovarian cancer twice. Dempsey is now a national spokesman for Breakaway From Cancer, which offers free services and programs for those affected by cancer. As for his faux medical job, Dempsey won't say if he's tired of playing doctor, but he stresses "Grey's" needs "to move forward and stay fresh." For now, he's focusing on his film career, which he hopes will get a boost from "Enchanted."
At least, he says, his daughter can watch his entire performance in the Disney flick. When the soapy bed-hopping "Grey's" is on, daddy's little princess is only allowed to watch him in selective scenes.
