What follows are some cover letters and resumes from my files. See what reactions you have to them as I share my own opinions with you.
How do you feel about the person who wrote this cover letter? Would you be willing to meet with her? I was. I did not hire her because I did not have an opening at the time. But I did take the time to meet with her because I was impressed with her letter. I thought that it would be good to see what she was like in person, in case I did need someone like her at a future time.
Obviously she had an advantage when she wrote this letter because she had actual agency experience to compare with the kind of work my agency was engaged in at the time. But that is not always necessary. What first caught my attention was the fact that she had taken the time to become familiar with the Rhode Island advertising scene as well as the account activity my agency had been involved in. Even if she had no practical experience to offer, I would have been interested enough to meet with her based on that alone.
The next letter is from a young man right out of college with no previous agency experience. His letter is a good example of how to translate academic experience into job-related qualifications.
How would you evaluate this candidate? Does his letter hold your attention? Do you want to look at his resume? Would you want to schedule an interview with him based on this letter?
I will give you my reaction to his letter. His opening was weak and vague. Here are examples:
- His first sentence is weak-his school and degree are not as important as the information included in the remainder of his beginning paragraph.
- His reference to his desire for a challenging and rewarding position is meaningless to me.
- When he says he wants a position with a "major advertising agency," exactly what does he consider a "major" agency to be?
The rest of his opening paragraph caught my attention and my interest because he told me that he felt he had the qualities to do well in advertising. I wanted to read on to find out what he thought those qualities were. As it turned out, he convinced me.
Those first few words in an opening paragraph are crucial. They will either grab your reader's interest or not. That means you have to say something that relates what you have to offer directly to the needs of the person you are addressing. Since this is a potential employer, you have to explain in the first sentence why you are different from all the other people out there clamoring for a job. You also have to make it clear how that difference would benefit the agency. The first paragraph also sets the tone for the rest of the letter.
The second paragraph of Ronald's letter illustrates how comments from teachers can be used in lieu of compliments from previous employers. Or how one's participation in school sports or any kind of extra-curricular activity could be used to develop benefit statements that you can adapt to a work-related situation. His third paragraph was an excellent tie-in of academic research and course work to the practicality of agency needs. And he ended his letter by keeping the ball in his own court when he said that he would call my secretary to set up an appointment.
Overall, this fellow effectively used the techniques I will outline here for writing a cover letter that communicates personal strengths in a way that would appeal to an employer.
Now, let us look at his resume. While it is not as strong as his cover letter, since he did not have much work experience, he did make the most of his responsibilities in previous jobs.
I am going to take Ronald's resume apart piece by piece so that you can get a sense of what to avoid when you are preparing your own.
Career objectives Aside from repeating his vague reference to wanting a position with a "major advertising agency," I found myself reacting negatively as well to his desire for "some" exposure to copywriting. Either he wants to write copy or he does not. This plus his stated aspiration to work in account services, which could be anything from sales to production, gave me the impression that he was not really sure what he wanted to do.
Education He listed his areas of study, but I would have found it more informative if he had briefly explained how each area prepared him for a career in advertising.
Experience When I turned my attention to this section (I prefer Work Experience), I felt he was more descriptive than the young lady back in the first resume. But he still could have gone further to demonstrate his responsibilities in prior jobs.
Using Cassidy Farms as an example, I rewrote what I thought he could have done to optimize his work experience. His objective should have been to translate his previous duties into skills that could be utilized in my agency. Keep in mind that my rewrite is a fabrication of job functions based on his few details.
Cassidy Farms, Wholesale Department, Newport, R.I. Responsible for taking customer orders which included: preparation and follow-through on detailed paperwork; exercising rigid control over company procedures to facilitate the smooth processing of each order; performing a constant inventory check to ensure stock availability. Direct involvement with customer relations when problems occurred. Responsibilities expanded into training and managing new employees.
References I dislike it when someone states "References Available upon Request." The reason is I want to know who the applicant has selected for references. This is my personal preference; many employers do not want references at this stage. You must decide for yourself, but I will tell you why I like this extra information. If a person omits past employers entirely and puts down clergy, friends, or teachers instead, there may have been a problem with the applicant's employment record somewhere along the line. The exception, of course, is if the person has never held a job before.
I prefer references to be listed with names, tides, the company or institution that person is from, and a phone number. I am not interested in addresses because I cannot take the time to write to anyone. A quick call to one of the references an applicant has listed can usually give me the information I need to decide if this is a qualified candidate or not. This has been a valuable time saver for me.
